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Amoszine 5
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Amoszine 5.adf
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Clinic.asc.cm
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Clinic.asc.cm
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Text File
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1992-02-26
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3KB
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72 lines
@5
C o d e C l i n i c
By The Great Oracle Lee 'someones eaten the postman' Bamber
@4
Well, I know we have readers now. The sales prove that. I saw them with
my own eyes. I can only conclude from the silence that everyone is so
informed and helped by each issue of AZ that no-one has ANY problems. It's
nice to know my work is finished. Everyone can start writing great stuff
now so I too have something to play besides my own next effort.
Am I right? Everyones happy. Ain't this just great. I'm really good at
this job.
I did get one mis-directed problem...It read 'I've been writing in Blitz
for a month now and all my games are crap'. Well what could I say, I just
replied, 'It's not you.'
(Yes folks with brain bigger than grape, it's cheap. It's easy. It's not
worthy of me or my time. But what the hell, I suppose Andy Gibson will
find it mildly amusing. That's after treatment, of course!)
Because someone always wants help, even though THEY DON'T WRITE ATALL!!! I
have one peice on information you can take away with you. Give you lives
the satisfaction of one more snippet of coding clout.
QQ> Hello code master, I'd like to be able to get past level 94 stage 3 on
super mario 15, could you give me the cheat?
CC> Well yes, first kick the kwap out of the familiy member who bought you
that stinking pile of hype and buy AMOS Professional. If you have not
got an Amiga, steal one. Before you play any games, you'll need to
know how to save a single byte of data to disk very quickly!
This is how it's done...
@6
Rem Make yourself 1 byte of data
Reserve as Work 10,1
Poke Start(10),123
Rem Save it to your disk
BSave "Very_Small_File",Start(10) To Start(10)+1
Rem Erase it so the computer doesn't know it, hehehe!
Poke Start(10),0
Rem Load it back
BLoad "Very_Small_File",Start(10)
Rem Show it to the nice people at home
Print Peek(Start(10))
@4
NOW, CHILDREN, GET REAL!! Send me some damn problems or I'll kick the
kwap out'a y'all, y'here!! I'm available for private hire but only in
countries with an inexhaustable supply of malteasers and a female only
population. The only other way you'll recieve my advice is through a
guy who uses our house as a garbage stop. Sod pushes any more litter
through my door and I'll tup him!
My residence can be localised to the street code WN3 4QG. Headed with
the name 'Rockville', the road is Warrington Road and is found in
Lower Ince in the town of Wigan, which is a plot on the county of
Lancashire. Make sense of the above and you will have earned your
right to speak your mind.
Oh, and lucky people get my brand new, laser printed Digital Ninja
Games List for 1995, totally free of charge. There is no checkup, and
no saleswomen will call. Don't delay, write in today.
It's been fun.
@2
[...big fading smile as article slows to an end...]